For Crying out Loud

So I have this “friend”.  I put that in quotations because I’ve recently come to realize that we really aren’t friends.  We met right after we both became pregnant with our oldest daughters.  Let’s call her Bella.  Bella & I worked together very closely during our pregnancies on YW stuff and really liked each other.  Ended up spending all kinds of time together.  Had our daughters only 8 days apart and they think they are BFF’s Forever.

Fast forward 10 years.  We’ve had some serious blow-outs since.  I totally get that I have responsibility for a lot of it.  I tend to be a little sarcastic and caustic and honest.  That being said, she has some responsibility in it too.  For some reason though, she has never acknowledged that fact.  She always treats me like I’m the reason everything is bad in our relationship and has told me I’m not “lifting” her up.  Whatever.  I don’t think she’s ever stopped to think about the fact that she doesn’t exactly do the same thing for anyone else.

So I was flipping channels the other night and watched “Mean Girls”.  I totally love that movie.  It is all too true.  Then the next day I was lurking in the blogging world and came across a blog that talked about that girl in school that was always mean to you, but for some reason you just had to be “friends” with her.  It hit me like a gorilla with a 2×4.  Bella is totally that friend!!

So now I’m examining my own feelings about our friendship.  I do really like being with Bella.  She is really fun and very spontaneous.  We once packed up all 7 of our combined kids and spent a week in Monterey together on 2 days notice.  BUT… she’s never, ever there for me.  I  had surgery in October and she never even called to see how I was doing.  Not even a simple phone call.  That was the beginning of my self-examination.  Why do I continue to subject myself to her?  Why????

If I figure it out, I’ll let you know.  If you have any comments, they would surely be welcome.