For Crying out Loud

So since this blog is new to me and you (blogging isn’t…hmmm mysterious) , I thought I’d better fill anyone who cares in on all the details. 

I am a Mom of 4 kids.  They are mostly great, but have their moments.  My oldest is a boy who is 12 (DS).  I also have 3 girls, ages 10, 6, and 4 (DD#1, DD#2, DD#3).  I am also a Wife and have been for around 15 years.  Mr. Man hates the DH term, so in case he sees this blog someday he will be so deemed.

I live somewhere in California (the nice parts by the ocean) and am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons).  I may use some LDS terminology sometimes.  If you are confused or need more info on that go here.  I’m a pretty liberal Mormon girl, Mr. Man is not (liberal or a girl).  But we make it work.  Prop. 8 was interesting at our house, to say the least.  I grew up in Utah and no, I don’t know how I turned out so liberal, but I’m grateful to be in California among my peeps.

I’m choosing to remain anonymous here because I’m a chicken.  I also may blog about stuff that will be hurtful to my friends and family on occasion and I’m not ready to go there.  If you are a Mommy or a Mormon I may have commented on your blog, but probably not.  I am a lurker.  There I said it.  Feel free to lurk with me.  Comments would be appreciated since this blog is meant to help me figure out the crazy stuff that goes on in both my head and my life, but if you’re a lurker, welcome anyway.  I totally get it.  Most of the time, I just don’t feel like anyone cares what I have to say, so I don’t say it, or someone has already said what I would say anyway.

If you do leave a comment, I would be very excited.  I have a family blog somewhere out there and my family never comments, so it would be exciting.  I might come out of the closet if I get enough attention comments.

More of my life will come out in the future, but you have the basics now, you know just in case anyone out there really cares.  I’m not sure you will.


I’m starting this blog because I have a lot of stuff in my head and can’t tell anybody without offending at least one person.  Hopefully, this will help.  I’m a mom, a wife and a pretty good friend, but sometimes there’s just stuff I want to say and can’t.

I don’t know if you’ll think I’m funny, mean or even interesting, but maybe I’ll feel better.  Comments will always be welcome.  Anything you have to say may help me decide if I’m crazy or not.  So here I go, hopefully someone out there will care.

So I have this “friend”.  I put that in quotations because I’ve recently come to realize that we really aren’t friends.  We met right after we both became pregnant with our oldest daughters.  Let’s call her Bella.  Bella & I worked together very closely during our pregnancies on YW stuff and really liked each other.  Ended up spending all kinds of time together.  Had our daughters only 8 days apart and they think they are BFF’s Forever.

Fast forward 10 years.  We’ve had some serious blow-outs since.  I totally get that I have responsibility for a lot of it.  I tend to be a little sarcastic and caustic and honest.  That being said, she has some responsibility in it too.  For some reason though, she has never acknowledged that fact.  She always treats me like I’m the reason everything is bad in our relationship and has told me I’m not “lifting” her up.  Whatever.  I don’t think she’s ever stopped to think about the fact that she doesn’t exactly do the same thing for anyone else.

So I was flipping channels the other night and watched “Mean Girls”.  I totally love that movie.  It is all too true.  Then the next day I was lurking in the blogging world and came across a blog that talked about that girl in school that was always mean to you, but for some reason you just had to be “friends” with her.  It hit me like a gorilla with a 2×4.  Bella is totally that friend!!

So now I’m examining my own feelings about our friendship.  I do really like being with Bella.  She is really fun and very spontaneous.  We once packed up all 7 of our combined kids and spent a week in Monterey together on 2 days notice.  BUT… she’s never, ever there for me.  I  had surgery in October and she never even called to see how I was doing.  Not even a simple phone call.  That was the beginning of my self-examination.  Why do I continue to subject myself to her?  Why????

If I figure it out, I’ll let you know.  If you have any comments, they would surely be welcome.

June 2018
« Jan